THE BRIGHTEST STAR

H.O.P.E(HOLD ON, PAIN ENDS)

By- Pratyush Kumar Shekhar         Email I'D- shekharofficial311@gmail.com

"TRIGGER WARNING:- This blogpost contains some sensitive topics that may disturb you. So kindly be neutral and try to understand the emotions behind the post."

Before I begin let's have a look at the bucket list of a person:-

1. Sending 100 kids to NASA workshop

2. Play football with Ronaldo.

3. Play a cricket match with a left hand.

4. Click a selfie with Robert Downey Jr. in an IRON MAN COSTUME.

5. Discuss national policies with Narendra Modi.

6. Attend a PINK FLOYD CONCERT.

7. Read Vedas and Meditate on Kailash.

8. Work for free education.

But unfortunately, the person who had such a vision is no longer with us. But what's more unfortunate is that his death is an unnatural one. He became a part of those 11 Indians in every 1 lakh Indians who lose their lives to suicide. He was one of that 6.5 % of Indians who suffers from some form of serious mental disorder. He was one of those majority of people who commit suicide below the age of 44. He turned out to be that person who teaches us to never commit suicide but lose peace himself and committed suicide. This unfortunate accident teaches us to always keep in touch with our loved ones. They may seem fine but maybe, deep down, their mental health may not be stable.

If a 34-year-old who is a part of FORBES top 100 richest Indian celebrities, who had worked in so many films with some of the greatest names of Bollywood, who suffered his mother's death just when he was 15 and who has witnessed so many setbacks and then each time rose to success can die like that, remember anyone can! It's high time we speak. 

It's often difficult to imagine what led a friend, family member, or celebrity to commit suicide. There may have been no clear warning signs, and you may wonder what clues you might have missed. Often, many factors combine to lead a person to the decision to take their own life. It's often an act made during a storm of strong emotions and life stresses rather than after careful consideration.

"Suicide is more complex than a decision"

People who attempt suicide aren’t always convinced it’s the only option. It’s more often than they have exhausted their emotional reserves to continue pursuing those options. It is, in many ways, the ultimate state of burnout.

That state of burnout doesn’t happen overnight, either.

In order to attempt suicide, a person has to be in the neurological state where they can override their own survival instincts. At that point, it’s an acute state — not totally unlike a heart attack or other medical crisis.

A person has to have reached a point when they feel their capacity for emotional pain has outweighed the amount of time they’re able to wait for relief, at the same moment when they have access to the means to end their life.

The thing I often tell loss survivors is that a suicide attempt isn’t unlike a “freak accident” — because a lot of little things have to align (in a really terrible way, yes) for suicide to happen.

The very fact that someone can progress that far is a much stronger reflection of the state of mental health in our country.

We didn’t fail, and neither did you. The system failed us all.

Our system almost always requires long periods of waiting (bringing people much closer to that acute state) and stigmatizes care that leads people holding out until the very last minute to get help, if ever, at a time when they really can’t afford to wait.

In other words? The time when someone in crisis has to expend the most energy in order to keep themselves alive — to ignore the intrusive thoughts, the impulses, and the outright despair — is often the time when they have the very least energy available to do so.

This is all to say, suicide is a tragic outcome of extraordinary circumstances that, in reality, few of us have a lot of control over.

Substance Use and Impulsivity

Drugs and alcohol can also influence a person who is feeling suicidal, making them more impulsive and likely to act upon their urges than they would be while sober. Substance and alcohol use can contribute to other reasons people commit suicide, such as the loss of jobs and relationships. The rates of substance use and alcohol use disorder are also higher among people with depression and other psychological disorders. Put these together and the risks increase.

Loss or Fear of Loss

A person may decide to take their own life when facing a loss or the fear of a loss. These situations can include:

• 1.Ending a romantic relationship or close friendship
• 2.Losing a job or being unemployed and unable to find a sufficient source of steady income
• 3.Financial problems
• 4.Losing social position
• 5.Losing your living situation due to financial reasons or the ending of a relationship
• 6.Academic failure
• 7.Losing social or family acceptance due to revealing your sexual orientation
• 8.Bullying, shaming, or humiliation, including cyberbullying
• 9. Being arrested or imprisoned.

It is even more important now to focus on the mental aspect of health. It is painful when we cannot find even one person to open inside out, among billions. It is more important now to share and care.

How to bring up suicide

• Ask how they’re feeling. For example, “Are you thinking about suicide?” “Have you thought about hurting yourself before?” “Do you have weapons or a plan?”
• Really listen to what they say. Even if what they’re going through doesn’t seem like a serious concern to you, acknowledge it by validating their feelings and offering empathy and support.
• Tell them you care and encourage them to get help. “What you’re feeling sounds really painful and difficult. I’m worried about you, because you’re really important to me. Can I call your therapist for you or help you look for one?”

Can you really change someone’s mind?

You can’t control someone’s thoughts and actions, but your words and actions have more power than you think.

If you think someone you know is at risk for suicide, it’s better to take action and offer help that isn’t needed than worry about being wrong and do nothing when they truly need help.

Here are some ways you can help:

• Take warning signs or threats of suicide seriously. If they say anything that concerns you, talk to someone you trust, such as a friend or family member. Then get help. Urge them to call a suicide hotline. If you believe their life is in immediate danger, call 911. If involving the police, stay with the person throughout the encounter to help maintain a sense of calm.
• Reserve judgment. Take care not to say anything that might seem judgmental or dismissive. Expressing shock or empty reassurances, such as “you’ll be fine,” may cause them to just shut down. Try asking instead what’s causing their suicidal feelings or how you might be able to help.
• Offer support if you can. Tell them you’re available to talk but know your limits. If you don’t think you can respond in a helpful way, don’t leave them on their own. Find someone who can stay with them and talk, such as another friend or family member, a therapist, a trusted teacher, or a peer support person.
• Reassure them. Remind them of their value and express your opinion that things will improve, but emphasize the importance of seeking professional help.
• Remove potentially harmful items. If they have access to weapons, medications, or other substances they could use to attempt suicide or overdose, take these away if you can.